Umm… exactly which end of the dog do you put these things?

I am shocked & appalled that Big Lots! would sell such a horribly criminal product! Boycott! Boycott!

20th Century Fox & Disney’s collaboration on “Alien vs. Eeyore: Oh, Joy.” met with mixed reviews.

I don’t think I’ll fit.

Worst PB&J sandwich ever.

The end is nigh.

When the Lamb opened the fourth seal, I heard the voice of the fourth living creature say, “Come and see!” I looked and there before me was a pale horse! Its rider was named Death, and Hades was following close behind him. They were given power over a fourth of the earth to kill by sword, famine and plague, and by Larry the Cable Guy’s Corn Muffin mix.

Is your gummy sense tingling?

Oh yes, you have a plethora.

Nothing inspires confidence quite like whimsically-spelled outlet store condoms.

This kid’s face is going to give me nightmares for months.

Make sure you wear protection.

Snacks from the wrong side of the tracks.

Oh, how the mighty have fallen.

At five for four bucks, I somehow ended up with 38 cans of this stuff.

Regrets, I’ve had a few.

It’s a bit nutty.

Seek medical attention immediately.